Comment
(UPDATE: I accidentally posted this a few moments ago, but without the actual comment from David. Then Blogger wouldn't let me back in to edit it. Now I'm reposting it properly using BlogThis! but won't be able to delete the wayward original for a while.)
Some of you may have noticed someone calling himself "David" lurking in the comments section.
David is mainly repelling, much in the same way that a drooling, retarded Rhesus monkey is just before you shoot it right between the fucking eyes with a .45. Yeah, kinda like that.
Well, as much as I (deservedly) rag on David, occassionally the alcoholic gremlin that gobbled his cereberal cortex and now lives in his skull can make me laugh.
Thus, I am reposting this comment from David because I fear that it may not get the attention it deserves languishing in some comment thread that nobody checks anymore.
Although I am the butt of David's twisted ranting, I have to say it made me chuckle. I post it here because I hope that you, the reader, will chuckle as well.
Apart from the fact that I clearly elevate you, the reader, above my own interests, this also proves that I am the kind of confident, self-deprecating blogger whom people will eagerly add to their "favorites" list. People will flock to read my unique combination of folksy wisdom and cutting-edge humor.
I think the blogosphere could really use something like that right now.
Some of you may have noticed someone calling himself "David" lurking in the comments section.
David is mainly repelling, much in the same way that a drooling, retarded Rhesus monkey is just before you shoot it right between the fucking eyes with a .45. Yeah, kinda like that.
Well, as much as I (deservedly) rag on David, occassionally the alcoholic gremlin that gobbled his cereberal cortex and now lives in his skull can make me laugh.
Thus, I am reposting this comment from David because I fear that it may not get the attention it deserves languishing in some comment thread that nobody checks anymore.
Although I am the butt of David's twisted ranting, I have to say it made me chuckle. I post it here because I hope that you, the reader, will chuckle as well.
Apart from the fact that I clearly elevate you, the reader, above my own interests, this also proves that I am the kind of confident, self-deprecating blogger whom people will eagerly add to their "favorites" list. People will flock to read my unique combination of folksy wisdom and cutting-edge humor.
I think the blogosphere could really use something like that right now.
Mayor, don't believe a word Scott says about me. When it comes to our relationship, he is consumed with jealousy and rage. Rage at the fact that everything he can do, I can do better. On the polo team, it was I who scored the most (on and off the field) and rode the finest steed. At restaurants, I'm always given a choice table, even if the place is packed, because I exude a kind of quiet, well-muscled glamor. As for Scott, well, let's just say it's best if I approach the maitre d' first if we expect to eat.
The sad fact is that he pays me to post comments on this blog. It's a per-word deal, with the only condition being that I use my mighty literary powers for good. If he keeps antagonizing me in his blog, I'm going to have to up my rates, which would of course push him deeper into debt. Mayor, its a long, sad tale, and I don't have the heart to continue it here. After all, Scott's heart is in the right place. He tries, you know? God how he tries.
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