Milestone
I have now accomplished one of the big Fatherly Duties: teaching Number One Son to ride a bicycle. None of those pussy training wheels, either. No offense if your kid rides a bike with training wheels, but let's face it, you're turning your kid into a wuss.
I don't think I'm exaggerating when I say that my kid is an athletic genius, either. He just turned 5 in November and he mastered the whole bike-riding thing after about 30 minutes of instruction and help. If this was an Xbox 360 game, I'd have just earned 50 gamer points.
Okay, his dismount consists of slowing down enough for him to leap clear of the bike, then watching as it crashes into the nearest object.
At one point, I was jogging in front of him, having him follow me and my turns. I made a big 180-degree loop and was heading back the way we had come when I heard a panicked "Daddy!" Apparently, he had only made about 90 degrees of the turn, and I turned my head to see him headed for a metal picnic table with his hands completely off the handlebars. BLAM! He slammed right into the table, but somehow managed to jump clear of the bike at the last instant and land on his feet. His face was frozen in an expression of terror, but it vanished in an instant, replaced by a slowly widening grin.
I expect future major Fatherly Duties will include helping him catch his first fish, fire a gun for the first time, leaving a porno mag (or folder of dirty jpegs as the case may be) conveniently findable, and helping him roll his first D&D character.
I don't think I'm exaggerating when I say that my kid is an athletic genius, either. He just turned 5 in November and he mastered the whole bike-riding thing after about 30 minutes of instruction and help. If this was an Xbox 360 game, I'd have just earned 50 gamer points.
Okay, his dismount consists of slowing down enough for him to leap clear of the bike, then watching as it crashes into the nearest object.
At one point, I was jogging in front of him, having him follow me and my turns. I made a big 180-degree loop and was heading back the way we had come when I heard a panicked "Daddy!" Apparently, he had only made about 90 degrees of the turn, and I turned my head to see him headed for a metal picnic table with his hands completely off the handlebars. BLAM! He slammed right into the table, but somehow managed to jump clear of the bike at the last instant and land on his feet. His face was frozen in an expression of terror, but it vanished in an instant, replaced by a slowly widening grin.
I expect future major Fatherly Duties will include helping him catch his first fish, fire a gun for the first time, leaving a porno mag (or folder of dirty jpegs as the case may be) conveniently findable, and helping him roll his first D&D character.
Labels: bicycle, fatherhood, number one son
